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Posts: 1119
Jun 3 07 9:52 PM
Statements like the above are what I find to be childish. I don't know about the previous cases, but by your own admission, in this particular case, it was your own behavior that provoked the result and you certainly have a choice on whether or not to exhibit that behavior. An adult would simply accept that and not worry about whether or not anyone else suffered consequences for their behavior.
Also, the fact is that, to the extent that you did what you did, that can be solved by one person, you, and you are the only one who has control over what you do. It almost sounds as if you're saying that you'll change your behavior if others change theirs first, and, my friend, that does not and cannot work.
You also wrote:
"Calling me childish is also your opinion Bob. And again, one that you are welcome to. Perhaps you are more capable than I am at handling insults. If that makes me a lesser man than you, so be it, I'm a lesser man."
First of all, I didn't call you childish. I said that pointing out the bad behavior of others when you suffered consequences for your own bad behavior is a childish thing to do as is running away because you didn't like the way that things were handled. And that is exactly the reactions I'd expect from a child. Also, if you bothered to read the whole post, I said that you had a choice and you still do.
Secondly, I made no comparisons of myself to you. The fact is that there was a time when I probably would have reacted in very much the same way that you did. However, I've learned a valuable lesson and that lesson is that it simply doesn't work. Unfortunately, it took a divorce for me to discover that wisdom.
Justin, you had several options on how you could have handled the situation. You could have simply left in order to cool off, or even go so far as to refuse to discuss whatever it was that caused you to get so emotional. In one particular case, involving a particular person who occasionally brings up certain topics in chat, I've had to make that choice myself.
If, in fact as you claim, you feel that you're being treated unfairly, then you had the option of privately complaining to management. Oh, I know, you said that you knew that it wouldn't do any good. Well, since you haven't bothered to do it, how could you possibly know that?
Also, if you really think that somebody's statements of full of whatever, then what is the point of even trying to discuss anything with them? If that's really the case, obviously you're not going to change their opinion, no matter how ridiculous or absurd you think that it might be.
Finally, you wrote:
"the definition of insanity is repeating the same thing and expecting different results. I can change one variable... me. However, for the other variables to change there has to be a WILLINGNESS to change. And so far, I don't see it at all. If it's immature to try to solve things in a manor that involves EVERYBODY stepping up to the plate... well, then I'll just stick with immaturity, as that really seems like the "adult" thing to do."
Justin, this is exactly the attitude that I find to be childish. You seem to be saying that, unless everybody else changes, then it does you no good to change. Well, let's just suppose that you hadn't said what you said, do you think that you would have been booted from chat? The answer is clearly no, but yet you persist in insisting that, while you can do your part, unless others change, the problem will persist when, in fact, quite clearly in this case, there'd have been no problem in the first place or the problem would have been resolved in your favor.
The reason you got booted was because of what you said, not because of anything that anybody else did, or are you going to try and convince us that you wouldn't have done that if someone else hadn't done what she did?
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