Are there some pieces of the puzzle you're not telling because I am confused. How is being deployed along with you (when it's lonely as hell in Iraq) a problem? And with being in the military, you act as if she actually has a choice in whether she goes or stays back.Sounds to me like she is being a pretty good wife (what woman would sacrifice time with a new baby in order to go to war) and just doing her duty. Please clarify....I would hate to give bad advice to a situation I don't understand.